Tuesday, November 06, 2012

The Random Pixels Losers Corner welcomes...

..."powerhouse trial attorney" Alan Kluger.

Veteran Miami trial attorney Alan Kluger enjoys owning things. And he likes talking about his possessions and having his picture taken with them.

Here's a Wall Street Journal story about Kluger and his 5,000 sq.ft. Aventura apartment.

And here's a magazine story about Kluger and his 650 bottle wine collection.

There even a picture on the Internet of Kluger standing in front of his art collection and holding onto his wife, Amy Dean, as if she's just another one of his possessions.

Looking at pictures of Kluger, you can almost see that plaque on his desk that reads, "I believe in the Golden Rule: He who has the gold makes the rules."

And, because Kluger is a "powerhouse attorney," he's also used to getting his way. He's not accustomed to taking orders from people he considers inferior to him.

In 2002, Kluger was kicked off an American Airlines Colorado-bound flight for causing a ruckus over the breakfast menu. From the Miami Herald:
Booted from a Colorado-bound American Airlines flight: Miami lawyer Alan Kluger - and he is steaming. A flight attendant claimed Kluger "caused a disturbance," according to a Miami-Dade police report. As Kluger , 51, and son Jesse, 20, taxied for an 8 a.m. takeoff aboard a Boeing 757 for a "spring break" ski trip to Vail on March 9, a female flight attendant took breakfast orders and told two fellow first-class passengers there was no raisin bran left, says Kluger . Just eggs. He, too, wanted something other than eggs, he says, and the attendant replied, "Eggs - or nothing."

Kluger says he turned to Jesse and said: "This is a bull--t way to treat first-class passengers." That's when a flight attendant, Kevin Carey, appeared. A tiff ensued. According to Kluger , he said: "We don't have to put up with you. I'm having the pilot go back to the gate . . . I make the rules around here." At 8:03 a.m., the jet returned to gate C-7.

Three cops and a federal agent from the new Transportation Security Administration met the plane. Kluger "stated that a male flight attendant was rude to him and that he wanted to make a complaint," says Officer John Hernandez's report. American's airport-based flight service manager Deborah Morris told police that flight attendant Carey "advised her that [Kluger] was verbally abusive and called him a 'faggot.' "

The Herald quoted Kluger as saying he was "humiliated and embarrassed" by the incident and that he had sent the airline a "threat-to-sue" letter. No! Really?

In short, Kluger is a living, breathing caricature of a pushy, obnoxious lawyer we all love to hate.

The other day Kluger once again tried to throw his weight around in a Miami courtroom; threatening to have Miami freelance photographer and blogger Carlos Miller barred from videotaping a court hearing.

On his blog Miller writes...
From the moment he walked into the courtroom last week, attorney Alan Kluger had an issue with my camera, spouting off some unwritten Florida Supreme Court law about needing to get written permission before being able to record a hearing.

He then claimed he had sat on some committee that enacted the rules that make Florida one of the most liberal states in the country when it comes to bringing cameras into the courtroom.

Yet he was trying his best to prevent me from recording the hearing in which his client, Miami Heat minority owner Raanan Katz, was suing a local blogger for defamation over her blog posts, which are all based on public records.

“I’m sure you’ll get thrown out because the way the rules work and I sat on the committee involving press is that you absolutely have to file a request so the court can ensure where you’re located and people find out who you are, so that they can vet you and find out you’re not allegedly press like their client claims to be press.”
He was completely wrong.
The judge allowed Miller to remain.

That didn't sit well with Kluger. Remember, he's used to getting his way. As he left the courtroom, he couldn't resist getting in the last word, telling Miller, “Are you a real journalist? You’re a clown.”

So, welcome, Alan Kluger. That little courtroom tantrum has earned you a richly deserved spot in the Random Pixels Losers Corner.

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