Your lunch hour time waster

Everyone has Olympic Fever and Simon's Cat and his animal friends are no different.

This video shows them caught up in the "excitement" of a snail race in the garden. That is, until a pesky hedgehog shows up and tries to eat one of the racers!



-via

The Random Pixels Losers Corner welcomes...

Kurt James: Convicted carjacker and major dumb ass.

...Kurt James.

Last week, in a Broward County courtroom, James went on trial on charges of armed carjacking and robbery with a firearm. He was looking at a possible sentence of life in prison if found guilty.

How did he find himself in this predicament?

The same way most wanna-be thugs end up in court these days: by being stupid. Only, in James' case; he was really stupid.

Local 10's John Turchin explains:

James was charged with one count of armed carjacking, one count of robbery with a firearm, both felonies, punishable by life in prison. He was also facing a couple of misdemeanors. According to the arrest form, James and two others held up a man at gunpoint as he was leaving International Brokers Realty off U.S. 1 and Pembroke Road October 18, 2010.

The victim testified that they got away with an $1,800 watch, his cell phone and a handful of other items. The record shows the trio tried to steal the man’s Mercedes but were unable to figure out how to get it in gear, and left in their own vehicle. They were caught minutes later after an intense pursuit through several cities.

But as is the case with most chronically stupid people, James apparently has no clue just how stupid he is.

Turchin reports that when James' case went to trial last week, he decided to represent himself, telling the judge: “I ain’t going to prison. You trippin’. I going to trial.”

That's right...a guy who couldn't figure out how steal a car, suddenly decides he wants to be a lawyer.

At one point during the trial, James admitted he was out of his league, telling Broward County assistant state attorney Scott Strauss: “That’s just how I talk, man. You don’t understand the street talk, how we talk.”

In the end, James' mouth and "street talk" may have earned him a very long stint as a guest of the State of Florida.

It took jurors only two hours to find him guilty of both felonies. He could go to prison for life.

Welcome to the Random Pixels Losers Corner, Kurt James. You truly are a dumb ass.
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Watch John Turchin's video report on James' trial by clicking here.

MM: June 1, 1926 - Aug. 5, 1962

“When she walked, it was as though she had a hundred body parts that moved separately in different directions. I mean, you didn’t know what body part to follow.” -Arthur Gelb, former New York Times managing editor as quoted by Maureen Dowd.

Miami News, Aug. 6, 1962.

Marilyn Monroe departs Miami International Airport for Mexico City,
Feb. 21, 1962. Photograph by Bob East.

Marilyn Monroe stops in Miami Beach on the way to Mexico City, Feb. 20, 1962.
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The Night Marilyn Sang "Happy Birthday" to JFK, May 19, 1962.

August

From Jeff Klinkenberg of the Tampa Bay Times:

It's August and I refuse to take the blame. August is always Florida's longest month — and not only because it lasts 31 days. It's the heat, man, it's the humidity and tropical weather, it's the mosquitoes. If you go swimming in the wrong place, an alligator might bite off your foot. A Florida August is Dante's Inferno come to life.

[...]

August separates the real Floridians from the fakes. Anyone can love Florida in January, when the air is cool and the mosquitoes, alligators and cockroaches are on their best behavior. But it takes a special person to appreciate a Florida August.

Read the rest of Klinkenberg's Sunday column by clicking here.

Miami Herald circulation director working overtime to piss off paper's few remaining subscribers [UPDATED x1]

UPDATED x1 below.
........

Here's the deal: You're the circulation director at the Miami Herald.

So, what's Job #1? Trying to get more people to subscribe to the paper and, retaining the loyal subscribers you already have...right?

And the best way to keep those paying subscribers fat and happy would be to treat them special and not send them annoying emails...right?

Well, check out this email forwarded to me today by a loyal, long-time Miami Herald subscriber.

Click to enlarge.

And here's a note the Herald subscriber sent to me explaining her reaction to the email:

I replied to email asking to receive the paper without the special section, and not to be charged the $1.25. We'll see what they say. Sure smacks of desperation, doesn't it? Charging for those ads in that Thanksgiving edition was madness (if I were a paying advertiser, I'd want to reach the largest possible audience, not a subset), and they didn't repeat it.

Now, charging for editorial coverage that would be the very reason you subscribe is more madness. To assume the whole readership is interested in football in exhaustive detail is some big assumption, isn't it? Can't wait for the Herald's online paywall sales pitch. By the way, I do pay for NYTimes online and it's well worth it.

Related post at JimRomenesko.com: We have your credit card number and we’ll charge you for whatever we want (and good luck trying to opt out!)
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UPDATE: Retired Miami Herald staff writer Marty Merzer has left this comment on Jim Romenesko's post:

"I spent 30 years as a proud employe of the Miami Herald, but the entity currently carrying that name is a different thing entirely. I know that some other papers have tried this scam recently, but it's difficult to see how it can be legal. At the very least, it unilaterally changes the nature of the contract between buyer and seller."

Curious Russian gopher is newest YouTube sensation

-via NPR:

by Robert Krulwich

How he got to live there, I don't know. For one thing he's a gopher, not a cosmonaut or a rocket engineer, just an ordinary Kazhakh rodent who dug himself a hole. The hole, however, is smack in the middle of a rocket launching facility, one of the most active spaceports in the world, called the Cosmodrome.

[...]

But take a look at this gopher. He (she?) seems more than comfortable. Giant platforms roll overhead — not a problem. Huge tall things loom nearby — so what? People come close. Does he care? No. But when someone sets a camera at the entrance of his home, suddenly he's Mr. Curious.